Thursday, September 29, 2005

Disappointment Greets The Tax Return

I was really looking forward to greeting my tax return this year. They generally take 14 days, 10 working days, to process. Mine took only 9 days to be credited to my account. And it was for the exact amount that the tax agent had calculated.

So why was I so disappointed to get what I expected and way ahead of time? Well, I'd recently had a look at my bank balance and thought that it would look so much better once my tax return was in there. But it was already in there!! And the balance was as good as it was going to get. It's all downhill from here folks.

I Went To The Pub Tonight

Not to drown my sorrows or anything. One of our sales engineers finished up today, although there will be a piss-up for him tomorrow, and he took us down to the pub. He's a Scotsman and anytime that a Scotsman is going to pay for something I have to be there. I got a photo of him with money in his hand, another with his wallet in his hand and the third one was one of him with his mouth shut. Amazing pictures. For some damned reason they won't load though.

I had a couple of soft drinks, one of which I bought myself, and they must have affected me as I missed my turnoff, twice. Ended up driving through the city to go home which turned out to be a blessing in disguise as I didn't have to drive as far to do my shopping. In fact, I was able to do it on the way home. There was a funny incident in the supermarket. Bear with me, I thought it was funny.

Sausages were on sale for A$2.99/kg. An older lady, with long, unkempt, greying hair, quite overweight and with a nasally voice wanted some of the sausages. Obviously didn't have a lot of money to spend and was being very careful. Got the poor shop assistant to take out eight, nine, no ten sausages and weigh them. Saw that it was under a kilo and walked back to the sausages to get a few more. Weight now came to about 940 grams so she got him to walk back and get one more. Total weight of 1008 grams and I thought that she would ask him to take eight grams off but thankfully she didn't.

There were two other women waiting to be served before me. The older lady proceeded to order other meats and ask what else was on special. Finally, she was finished and we other shoppers were having a smirk to ourselves. One of the women in front of me had two different meats measured off and the old lady came back to interrupt, quite oblivious to everyone else, and asked about the cooked chickens that were on special to see if the marked price was the special price. So, when the first other woman had finished it was the turn of the second other woman to get her needs from the deli. It was about this time that I realised I had meat at home and didn't need to wait any longer watching this pantomime and had been wasting about six minutes of my life.

I bumped into the two other women elsewhere in the shop and commented, "After all that I had meat at home already" and they thought that it was quite funny. We had been smiling amongst ourselves as everything had been going on without getting too upset by it all.

When everyone was gone I went back and got some of the sausages. They were not what I had originally planned to buy either.
My Pirate Name

My pirate name is:

Red Jack Vane

Passion is a big part of your life, which makes sense for a pirate. You tend to blend into the background occaisionally, but that's okay, because it's much easier to sneak up on people and disembowel them that way. Arr!

Get your own pirate name from

Thanks to Gleek for this.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Not The Best Way To Celebrate

I rang the missus yesterday to wish her a happy anniversary. As I suspected, she had forgotten. She should be receiving my card right about now. I guess that she doesn't know what day it is as she has so much to worry about.

Who am I to talk? I forgot that it was my parents' wedding anniversary as well. Thirty six years!! That's almost two life sentences - one each. Ha ha.

At lunch time I changed my flight to Korea. I'll be heading off in November and the ticket was A$270 less, although the taxes etc, including fuel surcharges, rose by A$45. You can't win 'em all. Now I just hope that the boss approves my new holiday timetable.

Last night I went off to play some volleyball. I had received a flyer from one of the local sporting centres and they said that the season was already underway but that they still required extra players. It was mixed volleyball where there had to be a minimum of two women on the team and the only players they were short of were women. So there was no need for me to be there and I didn't get a game. Not that I had a chance to embarress myself but maybe I am one of those sportsmen who was good at sports.

Not the best way to celebrate the anniversary. Bugger. Feeling a bit lonely.

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Thanks For The Day Off Queen Lizze

It's Queen Elizabeth II's birthday in April. So, just for good measure, Western Australia has a public holiday celebrating it in September. The rest of the country has a day off in June. What is really funny is that the British don't even have a public holiday for her birthday. A somewhat pointless holiday methinks. Nice to have the day off though. As soon as QE II karks it I think that the Australian government will drop the holiday as I can't see us having the King's Birthday Holiday. Nobody likes Charles that much.

Of course I went and played golf. Badly. Very badly. What a horrid game. I didn't score any pars, hit any greens in regulation or have any single putts. I officially suck at golf. Last weekend, at a different course, I had 33 putts and yesterday I had 42. My score was nine shots worse than last week and it appears that the difference was only in the putting. The only interesting part of the game was the duck that I took a photo of.

The wildlife was more interesting than my game. By far.

We have a saying in football along the lines of "running up a cricket score". This means that a very large score has been made. Is it an amazing coincidence or what that I scored the same as the AFL grand finalists, 54-58? Blows me away when I think of it. My golf is a footy score.

Speaking of footy I noticed that the Bearded Burbler is no longer bearded. Has he downgraded himself to just that of the Burbler?

Also speaking of footy I believe that you should never forget your roots. The Sydney Swans, AFL premiers for 2005, moved from South Melbourne in 1982. Up until that time they were known as the Bloods or the Southerners. I was reading the history from the Essendon Football Club last night and you should never forget your past as it makes you what you are today. I say this in response to all of the people that criticised others who said they were supporting South Melbourne in the grand final. Hey, Essendon have signed a 30 year deal to play at the MCG but their home will always be Windy Hill which wasn't even their first home. The Coleman Medal, awarded to the leading goalkicker in the regular season, was named after an Essendon full forward, John Coleman, who kicked 12 goals on debut against Hawthorn and scored over 100 goals for the season. Those that have lived and breathed South Melbourne deserve to remember where their team came from.

That's it. Back to your lives people. Oh, yeah - it's our eighth wedding anniversary today. Eight years. They have gone so quickly. Gosh, what have we done together? It doesn't feel anything like it. When I look at the fact that we have a kid who is nearly five and a half I start to imagine that it has been that long.

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Got Off My Arse And Did Something Today

Had a good yack to the missus and the boy this morning. Things appear to be calming down a bit over there. After brekkie I did some gardening. Yesterday I levelled the backyard and this morning I seeded it with lawnseed. Will find out in a few weeks if it has been successful. Have to water the damn thing 2-3 times a day for the next 3-4 weeks.

After that I had some lunch followed by an hour or so of uninstalling/reinstalling my TV tuner card to get it working properly again. Finally had some success.

Then I had to make a decision regarding what to do today. I thought that a bike ride would be a good idea and I took my camera with me.

The local wetland has enjoyed the Spring rains
Look at the algal bloom in the wetland
A few days ago this footpath would have been impassible
Is this a wattle in full bloom?
I have no idea what this plant is but it crept all the way up to the top of a eucalyptus
Here's something you don't see everyday - a brown and white house
Which dingbat architect designed this?
Local fishing spot
Dig those crazy tree roots by the river
It's Nessie!
Water fowl wandering about on a path that you can normally walk on
This slimy mess looks like the top of my milo
Goal mouth action in a local soccer match
Free kick about to be taken
I watched the second half of a local soccer match. It was quite entertaining and end-to-end action. Just before the game finished one of the strikers from the blue side had a beautiful cross put to him and he only had the small goalie to beat. What did he do? He nearly put the ball into the river. Gee it was funny. Only minutes before there had been a goalmouth scramble after the goalie dropped a corner kick and the blue team scored.
Watch Out Europe - Here Come The Hammers

West Ham United are sitting pretty in fourth place in the English Premier League as I type this following a draw against those deadbeats, what was their name again, oh yeah - Arsenal.

We are sitting above Manchester United, Arsenal, Liverpool and Everton. I am not one to count my chickens before they are hatched but I have to bask in the limelight given the opportunity.
The Boss's 50th Birthday Party

My boss's 50th birthday celebrations coincided with the 109th AFL Grand Final between Sydney Swans and the West Coast Eagles from Perth. He invited lots of people to his place and it started early in the day with those wishing to watch the game.

There's always one at every party and at this one there were two of us - those people who aren't supporting the teams playing. I wore my Essendon tracksuit and Lyn wore her Port Adelaide guernsey. Everyone in the house was supporting West Coast apart from me as I wanted to see Sydney win.

My boss's mother-in-law is a funny old lady and she gives as good as she gets. She piled shit on me the whole time she was there as she obviously doesn't like anyone who doesn't support the Eagles. The beer, hot dogs and other food were plentiful and it was an enjoyable game to watch. I was the only one happy at the end as the Swans were victorious by only four points.

After the game and later in the evening more and more people rolled in. Interestingly we were asked to make our own pizzas for tea and I must say that it was a very successful idea. My boss has some nice friends and it was an evening filled with lots of talk, something that isn't usually possible during working hours. And my workmates haven't normally had that much to drink at work either. About 10:30 at night it turned into a jam session with guitars, amps and singing. The alcohol was still flowing. I don't know how some people were still standing.

Great to watch the footy with friends and thankfully it was a good game too.

Friday, September 23, 2005

Is She Trying To Ruin His Reputation Or Enhance It?

Warney, Warney, Warney. What have we been up to? News report today says that a 37 year old woman, Julia Reynolds, had a five hour sex romp with Shane Warne on the eve of the Fourth Ashes Test. Warney subsequently got out for a golden duck the following day.

She said, "I guess you could say I've done my bit for England." Maybe she wasn't lying back and thinking of England as Warney is only worth about five minutes of fun normally. According to the previous liaison that he had anyway. Must have been fairly involving and she sounded quite proud that he was exhausted afterwards.

If it helped England win the Ashes, so be it. That's doing it for your country. But I want to know is she:
a) Trying to enhance her man-eating ego,
b) Trying to ruin Warney's reputation,
c) Trying to improve Warney's reputation,
d) Just some broad that got paid lots of money to spill her guts to the newspaper (what can Warney do in his defence?)
e) An agent for the Marlybone Cricket Club and being paid by the England Cricket Council.
Mt Lawley Has Certainly Changed

Went to get some alcohol last night. Steady on. It wasn't for me. A workmate is turning 50 today. Had to go on a bit of a mission as the Kentucky Gold Bourbon that he likes is not sold by everyone. It is sold exclusively by Liquorland and my mission took me to Mt Lawley. Onto the same street that I used to live on, in fact. My how Mt Lawley has changed.

Zimmermann's Photographical shop has been knocked down. It's an unbelievable sight. And the site is obviously worth a packet as Mt Lawley is one of the upperclass suburbs.

Further up Beaufort St was a large block of land that I believe was owned by Peth College which is nearby. Imagine my shock when I saw the new houses built on top and what was planned for the future. There's a bit of money floating around.
Feeling Like I'm And Old Man

I was feeling a bit fat so I went for a walk last night to the post office. Actually, I walked to the post office in the morning too so I did a fair amount of walking yesterday. Probably the main reason I was feeling fat was the simple fact that I had eaten 18 inches of Subway sandwich and half a block of chocolate. Yum. I did manage to control myself and leave a 6 inch sandwich for Ron. Later Ron.

I managed to trip on some paving on the sidewalk that had been raised by a tree root and was that close to going arse over tit that it wasn't funny. Nearly scraped my nose on the footpath. It was at that moment that I realised I was a fat, old f*** (couple of words fit there).

Last night whilst sleeping I dreamt about driving to tomorrow's AFL Grand Final with my wife. This would not be a recommendable experience as she's not the greatest person to be travelling long distances with. And the score that was running through my head was Sydney 120 def West Coast 70. There, I've stuck my head on the chopping block. It's not so much my prediction but a feeling.

Maybe it was the capsicum and pickles from the Subway sandwich talking. There might just be something in this eating-spicy-food-before-going-to-bed-to-have-strange-dreams thing.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Which Killer Are You?

Not a question that I ask myself too often. I am, after all, my own man. Just looking at Insane Tom's blog and came across this little quiz. Probably not for the squeamish of you out there. Remember my outcome, James.

If i was a serial killer i would be Jack the Ripper.

Jack the Ripper, by far the most notorious killer of all time. What would drive a man to kill 5 prostitutes, surgically mutilate the bodies, then stop, to never be heard from again? Most of the murders were pretty much the same, the victim had her throat cut and her abdomen exposed, the intestines were placed over her right shoulder and sometimes a kidney or even the heart had been removed.

Jack the Ripper's murders are still unsolved.

Kill count: 5

Find what serial killer you would be, Take the Serial Killer Quiz now!
Strange Dream Again Last Night

What on earth is this dream trying to tell me?

I was working in China near a large stadium and all of my fellow workmates were Aussies. My wife was in the workshop and then I pashed Trent Croad. Trent asked me if my wife would mind and I said that it didn't bother her. I don't even like the guy as a football and how on earth he was named as an All Australian member this year has me beat. Mind you, Croad's girlfriend, Tanya Stewart, is rather hot.

Then we went to the stadium to watch the big game and at that time my mother-in-law made an appearance. My missus got to the stadium before me and rang me - neither of us have a mobile.

I reckon it was the mouth-burning kimchee that I had last night in my bolognese. It was extremely hot.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Velcommen Min Norwegen Venn Eller Venninne

Hvordan har du det? Velcommen til min blog. Kan du si meg hvor du leve? Naer Rosenborg or Heimdall? Trondheim, Narvik, og Bergen er skjonn.

I see that my friend from Trondheim has now popped over to look at the Frugal Bastard. Drop me an email sometime. I loved Norway. The language sounds so beautiful, much like singing, and the scenery is quite spectacular. People were very friendly and I could see myself staying there if I had the opportunity. I ended up spending a few weeks there and went to Narvik, in the Arctic Circle, twice. Not sure that I could live right up there though. Yep, fond memories of that country.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005


Blake Reynolds, a 14 year old boy from Perth, goes missing. Three weeks pass and numerous sightings of him were made throughout the region. His face is plastered all over the media to help jog people's memories. A huge police hunt was conducted, rivers and water tanks were scoured, but hope was not lost.

Yesterday he was found. Only 100 metres from where he disappeared. It seems that two men kidnapped him and held him locked in a house. He even saw the news reports and his mum pleading for his safe return.

I don't think those two men will survive long in prison, no matter what they did to that boy. But I found it interesting that the local news showed his face in all the images of his return to his family last night. Of course they would. What needs to be hidden. But this morning on the national news broadcast his face was blurred. For three weeks it has been "have you seen this boy" and now all of a sudden his identity needs to be hidden. How dumb.

Blog Visitors

I have a counter on my blogs. My own Frugal Bastard blog counter is increased when someone comments and I reply to that comment. So I found it really funny that my Jap/Korea blog, of which I don't visit and falsely bump up the visitor numbers, and which doesn't have any new material added as it is just a diary of my first trip to Japan and Korea, gets heaps more visitors than my live blog. Many thanks to the person from that lovely part of the world, Trondheim, NTNU who has been visiting the site regularly, inflating my ego. Your cheque is in the mail.
Better Get A Lawyer Son. Better Get A Real Good One.

Barry Hall, captain of the Sydney Swans, in a Preliminary Final to qualify for the Grand Final, punches an opponent in the stomach. Said opponent goes down like a sack of potatoes, for about 30 seconds, and Hall ends up kicking a goal soon afterwards. All of this is caught on camera and is quite clear and damning.

The man obviously has a case to answer and suspension seems the only likely outcome. But with a new points system for on-field indiscretions there is much debate about the seriousness of the charge and, if a few more points could be taken out of the equation and an early guilty plea entered, he may yet play in the GF.

Many of his peers support his inclusion in the squad for the GF. "Free Barry - Let Him Play" is the call. Even Kevin Sheedy came on the TV this morning and said that if a bloke was going to be suspended for 4 weeks for hitting someone then missing a GF is fair enough. But, if he was only going to miss 1 match why not make him miss the rematch with the team that the offence was committed against in the following season. Too harsh a penalty to miss a GF was his opinion.

I was thinking along the lines of the Norwegians. They are a forward-thinking group of people. If a Norwegian is found guilty of drink driving and they have to spend a few weeks in jail as a result they have the option to serve the time when they wish to. I.e. "I'm off to Spain for 3 weeks holiday" translates to "I got done for drink driving and will head off to jail during my holidays so that nobody notices". Couldn't Barry Hall take a similar penalty?

It turns out that Mr Hall did get a good lawyer. Perhaps the reincarnation of Johnny Cochrane. His lawyer defended Zdravko Micevic, the bouncer who hit one of my childhood stars, David Hookes, who subsequently died - The David Hookes Foundation was subsequently created. Micevic was found not guilty by a jury as they couldn't decide which version of the story to believe.

Mr Hall's lawyer pulled a masterstroke. The ball had been deemed not to be "in play" by the match review committee, as it was about 40m away. Therefore, the punch had been concluded to have taken place "behind the play". A scurrilous tactic indeed. "Off with his head" was the cry. Well, no. Not quite. The case was argued that players within kicking distance of the ball were actually that section of the ground known as "in play". I tend to agree. The ball could come to them at any time. It meant with his early guilty plea and the associated reduction in penalty, Barry Hall escaped with a reprimand and not a suspension.

OJ Simpson would be proud of that effort. And it will make for a fine spectacle of a GF.
Making Kimchee Made Simple

I finished making some kimchee tonight. Not sure what it tastes like yet. Will probably burn my intestines.

Firstly you cut up a chinese cabbage. Wash, if you wish, then chop and add heaps of salt. Allow to do whatever it is doing by standing overnight. Stand the cabbage and not yourself. You have a busy day tomorrow and would be too tired to accomplish anything of use if you were standing all night. Then rinse, quite thoroughly if you haven't washed beforehand, then allow to drain overnight after squeezing as much water out as you can. This is a time-consuming art. Time consuming as it has taken over 8 years to get the secret to making this stuff out of my wife.

The cabbage, awaiting the assault of the chili powder et al.

Further ingredients required are, from the left; <1 tspn of sugar, ~3 heaped tablespoons of chili powder and something like 50mL of fish sauce (which will take ages to pour into the bowl). Also note that approximately one clove of crushed garlic has been added to the mixture (sans chili powder at the moment).

Sugar, chili powder, fish sauce and garlic.

Next, mix the chili powder with the other ingredients until it has a rich, thick texture. I don't know what that means either so no emails please.

Beware of fireworks.

Mix by hand, complete with glove so as not to burn your skin as this stuff could be used in nuclear warfare, and add chili powder if the mixture doesn't appear to have the potency for killing a large male deer. Once satisfied please test on the nearest available large male deer.

Don't wipe your eyes whilst doing this at home, kiddies.

The finished product. Well, not quite. Place in a sealed container and put in the fridge for a day or two. Invite some people that you quite dislike to your house for a meal and put it on their plate. Make sure they try some believe the plate is dissolved.

Almost ready to inflict pain on someone.
Few Silly Pics, And Comments, From Today's Walk

And what, dear calculator, does that mean? I thought that you weren't a technical calculator anyway.

What more needs to be said? Strikingly obvious. Cool number plate though.

Must be important! Mind you, in Japan if it was important there would be 8 or 9 blokes standing around.

Just in case you are lost. Could be tricky when you are already in Perth.

And be careful of falling bikes while you are out for a wander.

How these people manage to pass courses I'll never know. There were three vehicles parked in the six motorcycle bays. If they can't read a simple sign what hope is there?

Bit cloudy out, it were. Wee bit of rain about too.
International Talk Like A Pirate Day

Did the UN really sanction International Talk Like A Pirate Day? How strange. I thought that the UN stood for good and equality in the world. Not the encouragement of robbers at sea. How on earth can they promote this?

Next it will be International Behave Like A Dictator Day - take your pick - Idi Amin, Adolf Hitler, Saddam Hussein, George W. Bush....

Closely followed by International Act Like A Terrorist Day - take your pick - Osama bin Laden, Abu Bakar Bashir, George W. Bush....

I would have thought that the UN had more important issues to worry about.

Monday, September 19, 2005

And Now For A Walk Around The New Subiaco

Had to clear my head at lunchtime and so I went for a wander around the new Subiaco. There's a park and lake near work, well there's a couple actually, but I chose the one that had the recent buildings. I like a bit of architecture, I does.

Lots of rich people live in the area and there is very little space leftover, as you will notice with the houses built right up against each other.

There is somewhat an English feel about it with the small courtyards and tiny fences, don't you think?

Very quiet during the day as most of the breadwinners are out doing their thing I suppose. Few posh cars drove by. If you can afford a place like that I'm sure you don't want to put up with an old banger. With the fronts being so nice I was disappointed to see how bad the rear of the places looked.

Still a bit of development going on in the area as it isn't completely built-out yet. I'm not sure what one of these places would go for but I'm guessing that you would need to come up with more than half a million smackeroos.

That's it. All over. Go back to your lives now.

Sunday, September 18, 2005

Good Day Out On The Golf Course

Not a perfect game but much better than of late. Can't believe that I didn't hit a single par though. I rang Whaleback Golf Course early in the morning to see if I could get a hit about 10 and they booked me in with a couple at 10:48.

With my council rates there was voucher for a bucket of 30 balls at the driving range. On the way to the driving range I met up with Daniel whom I'm played golf with last weekend. He hadn't booked for a game but wanted to join. Something that I wanted to work on was a cure for my slice. Out of the 30 balls I practiced with, only about three or four were sliced. Looking good. Out onto the putting green and I had the powerful thought "I can putt anything". Putting wasn't too bad. Looking good.

People were a bit slow on the course today. We didn't tee off until 11:12, four groups late in fact. On the tee we met Jimmy and Deb Jordan from Louisiana. By crikey Jimmy could strike a ball - almost as well as Daniel.

During the week when I visited my accountant I got to read a golf magazine in the waiting room. It discussed a method to stop slicing and also had a putting/handicap guide. Today I was rather interested in how many putts I would take and the indicative score that I should have.

How good is your putting? And what about the rest of your game?

With all of this in mind I teed off on the first and second holes quite well. I kept track of shots and putts for myself and Daniel. Steady golf, I was playing, until the par-4 5th where I had an eight. My front nine score of 51 was an improvement on last weekend and I had a total of 17 putts. Daniel scored 41 (pretty poor effort from him) and had 16 putts.

What are you doing out there Daniel? Championship is slipping away, mate.

The back nine was fairly steady until the 15th and 16th where I scored a pair of eights. I actually won the honours for the 12th and held them until the 15th. Last weekend I didn't win a single hole whilst playing Daniel and Brad. Came home with a 52 and 16 putts with Daniel shooting a 44 with 18 putts. Daniel shot 85 off the stick with 34 putts, and according to the chart he should be shooting a 79. Daniel played yesterday and last weekend scoring a pair of 78s. I had 33 putts which can be extrapolated to an average score of 77. Sort of pales into insignificance with my 103. Just shows how crap the rest of my game is. On the 16th and 17th I hit a couple of magnificent irons which had been sadly lacking for the whole day. Best score I've had for ages though. Can you believe that I had seven holes where I only needed one putt?

Daniel and Jimmy watching Deb

Deb following through

How's this for a coincidence - Jimmy works for a company I have dealt with and I was able to remember the name of one of the guys he works with. It is such a small world. A great day golfing as Jimmy and Deb are really nice people and a bit of fun out on the golf course.

It's a real pity that I can't upload video. I have some funny stuff about Daniel duffing his tee on the 13th. For some reason the audio didn't work or it would be really funny. Almost everyone, including me, that was videoed stuffed that shot - whether or not they knew they were on camera.

Below is a screenshot from my tee shot on the 13th. I have Ulead video/photo editing software on my computer but do you think that I can capture an image from a video? No. I had to open the video in ACDSee, do a Print Screen from the keyboard, paste into Paint and save as a jpeg, then crop in ACDSee. What a bloody hassle. Forgive the graininess of the jpeg as I can't do much better. ACDSee wouldn't allow me to capture the image directly as I required Quicktime ver 6 or higher with authoring rights. Bugger, all I want is to capture a screenshot from a video. If someone can help me out with some recommended software I would be all ears. As if I'm not already.

What's wrong with this picture - I sliced the tee shot?

Saturday, September 17, 2005

Plenty Happening Over At "I Have Nothing To Wear"

Check it. I've uploaded a heap of photos of Miky's clothes from here Graduation Fashion Show at her blog - I Have Nothing To Wear.

Friday, September 16, 2005

Terrifying Trend Towards Obesity

I noticed a news article with some disturbing results from a survey of young women and how their weight had increased by close to half a kilogram a year. Very disturbing. It shows that obesity problems are going to accelerate in this country.

Half a kilo a year? Yowser. Mind you, I've put on two kilos in six weeks so who am I to comment?
Time To Wash The Dishes Again

I've run out of bowls. Guess I had better do something about that.
I'm No Dreamweaver So What Does It Mean?

I had an interesting dream last night. Accordingly to NYM my dream interpretation skills are sadly lacking, suck is how she described them I believe.

In my dream Miky and I went to some sort of resort. There were a lot of accommodation units, tennis courts and a pool. Across the road was a golf course. By the time the weekend came it was time for me to play golf. So I lined up with some friends, whom I don't know in reality (what is that nowadays anyway?), and they managed to get their tickets from the proshop. When it came to my turn to order a ticket (paying green fees) I had to wait and the area behind the counter became some sort of stage like Broadway and there was a vaudeville act that took place and lasted for an hour.

I was becoming frustrated but waited it out for a total of an hour. Finally my ticket arrived and I had a medal and a pearl necklace bestowed upon me as though I was the Pope. It was in recognition of my abilities as a leader and showing great restraint whilst waiting for the hour.

But before we could head to the golf course we had to go through some sort of large obstacle course. It was a challenge a bit like Survivor - having to walk through a large bird cage, tricky bridges and it lead to a pathway with deceiving looks - you could lose your balance and the camber of the path didn't match what your eyes and brain indicated. So, being the leader, I undertook the path first and successfully negotiated it.

There were a pair of large doors at the end of the path and a switch to open them. I don't know why but I thought carefully about that and made sure that everyone had negotiated the path before pressing the button. On the other side of the door was another switch, much like a light switch, but when it was pressed it had to be held in place as it had a mechanism to return to the off position. If I let go of the switch the doors would close and it is very difficult to maintain the switch. My finger slipped and one of the doors closed. It was at this point that I realised if the doors shut then all of the people on the other side of the doors would die. Coincidentally, it was at this point that everyone on the other side of the door also realised if the doors shut then would all die.

Pandemonium set in and everyone tried to force their way through at the same time. Of course no-one was getting through the door because of this. And the pressure to hold the switch was enormous as my finger was really sore. You should have seen the look of terror on the people's faces.

Then I woke up. Interpretations are most welcome. Think about it before you read my postscript below.

Post thought - I realised shortly afterwards that if I had been able to lead these people through I would have been able to pass the test. Commanding them to line up single file and pass through the doors in an orderly fashion, however difficult once panic had set in, would have worked. The dream was a bit chilling actually.
Pizza Night

As I was driving home last night a hankering for pizza overcame me. At the traffic lights I pulled my big, fat wallet out (gee I have a lot of business and loyalty cards) and desperately searched for a Dominos Pizza coupon. And it was not to be found. But I knew that I had one.

Upon arriving home I found the voucher quite quickly. By this time didn’t feel like eating pizza all alone so I rang my friend Ben to see what he and his family were doing for tea. He hadn’t decided yet and he was going to do the cooking anyway. So Ben put his order in for Roast Garlic and Olive Supreme and off I choofed to the pizza shop.

It was nice to sit down with someone and chat about heaps of things that have happened recently. I guess it has been a month since I’ve seen Ben and his family although I can catch up a bit from his blog. Kids love pizza so it wasn’t a bad idea.

I don’t know what it is but Ben’s eldest daughter was crazy about having some books read to her and we got through four before I told her that I was all read out. And she bought that. Gosh, it’s been a long time since I’ve read a book to a kid.

Great to catch up and spend time with friends.

As I write this I’m listening to the techno beat of 2 Unlimited and it’s only 6:30am. Good way to start the day. “Kickstart my heart” by Motley Crue is the ultimate heart starter song though.

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Obviously A Long Lost Relative

Just cruising the Net when I found this excerpt from this site:

Monday, April 16, 2001
After an unprecedented ten consecutive victories by Kenyans in the men's race, Lee Bong-Ju of Korea halted the streak with his 2:09:43 win. The last Korean winner at Boston prior to Lee was Kee Yong Ham, who was the men's race champion in 1950.

Another Ham doing well. Good to see.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Some More Prattle From Hammy

I worked a bit late tonight. The wife is away so what else should I do? I know, it's a sickness and I require treatment.

On the way home I was thinking about how I would be making a difference, on the road that is. My car is not usually about at that time and so the traffic signals may have to make adjustments for my being there.

Then it occurred to me that perhaps somebody else finished work early and that cancelled out the unusual situation that I had found myself in. The traffic lights couldn't give a rats arse that I existed. My being was of no significance. So I crawled back into my shell.

Went to the travel agent today to confirm my booking for Korea and pay a deposit. I'd done some research on the cost of travel insurance and pointed out the best price that I could get. I wasn't too impressed with their 31 days option closely followed by 5 weeks as my trip is 32 days in duration. Could I have one or two days where I'm not covered by insurance perhaps? My travel agent's response was that "We can offer our customers an additional two days" and she knocked 15% off her asking price immediately. So yours truly signed up straight away. What didn't impress me was the fact that cover was provided for SE Asia, Nth America, Sth America, Europe etc but Korea fell under "China (Other)". I beg your pardon? NE Asia would have been far more appropriate. Don't tell the Koreans that they are considered to be other Chinese.

Want to save money on petrol? Why don't you follow Andrew Peawit's, sorry, Peacock's example and start walking more often? At least he will be after copping a drivers licence suspension for six months for drink driving. Idiot.

Are thoughts in your head solid? Does your head have thoughts rattling about inside if you shake it?

Picking your nose is so underrated. It is a simple, inexpensive pleasure in life. Now, picking someone else's nose is disgusting. I hate having to clean my son's nose for him but would have no trouble doing my own. You can't put enough hankie between me and his boogers to feel comfortable. When you can pull your own booger out and it stretches greater than the length of your nose the satisfaction is enormous.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Passing Thoughts ... And Some That Wouldn't Pass With A Strong Laxative

Didn't have a great nights sleep as I knew that Australia had lost the Ashes by the time I hit the sack. Do you realise that about 4 million of Australia's population, see graph, have never known anything other than Australia holding the Ashes. Very disappointing. Well done England. And Wales. And South Africa. And Papua New Guinea. Bastards.

Had a great opportunity to take a photo of the mad woman who rides around Subiaco on her bike/motorbike and waves Australian flags and yells some abuse/encouragement (?!) at people in the vicinity. Unfortunately I didn't have my camera. I'm no Jimmy Olsen.

Tourette Syndrome - spare a thought for the poor buggers with worse problems, namely Threerette or Fourrette Syndrome. They are sufferers with accelerated levels of Tourettes.

Rang my missus today and she wanted me to talk to Yu-Jin. We spoke for a few minutes and then I asked him to tell mum something. The little bugger hanged the phone up.

Finished work at lunchtime today. Had to do my tax return and it is too complex for me. Last year the accountancy that does my tax return changed hands and today I met the director who has taken over. He did my return actually. I felt quite at ease as he appears to be Jewish. The large picture of Jerusalem on the wall behind him, Christ on a cross on another wall, the surname Maxwell, etc. No skullcap to mention however. He's obviously going to be careful with my money based on his upbringing, is he not? Or am I stereotyping too much?

Got to spend the afternoon on myself. Did a bit of shopping, paid a bill, checked out travel insurance for my upcoming trip to Korea. On the walk home I popped into Travelworld to see how expensive the insurance that they offered was. The travel agent was looking at the world map, pointed to South Korea, and asked me if that was Korea. I told her that I would have left if she hadn't been able to point it out. Would you buy a ticket from a person who couldn't show where you were headed?

Getting sick of receiving emails about a petrol buying strike planned for the 22nd of September. Don't people realise that this will have no tangible affect on the oil companies? They can raise the prices the following day to catch all of those people out anyway. People have to buy fuel as not everyone is going to walk to work that day. Not worth the trouble people.

I've been spending more time talking to myself lately. Perhaps it is because I am on my own. Maybe I am mad. Or it could be that the only intelligent conversation is one that I have with myself. Nah, I didn't think so. (Yes you did.) Ok, maybe a little.

Had one of those telemarketers from a company that has an unrecallable name no matter how many times they repeat it. Her first question was along the lines of, "Do you own any property, have loans or a mortgage?" Taking into consideration what my mate Ben said of telemarketers I just told her that I wouldn't be answering any of her questions. It didn't take long for her to wish me a good night.

Amazing. I rang Centrelink tonight and got to speak to a real person after only one or two rings. None of this 25 minutes of hanging on the line crap. She did warn me that her computer looked like it was about to crash though.

Made a big curry tonight that will take about three weeks to eat. It took almost as long to prepare and cook it. Yum yum yum yum yum.

Sunday, September 11, 2005

It’s Been A Busy Weekend

Guess it all started on Friday night. I did all of the washing whilst watching the semi-final match between Sydney and Geelong as I watched the 5th Ashes Test on another station. It was a nice start to the weekend.

Up early Saturday morning, which wasn’t such a great idea considering how late I had gone to bed the night before. I was hanging the washing out at 7am and my hands were pretty cold by the time I had finished. Went to pick my mate Bill up and he told me that it was a cold morning and had been 2 degrees at 7 o’clock. Yeah, I can vouch for that.

We were back at my place just before 8 and about 10 minutes later our new couch arrived. Only just had time to unwrap it before I needed to duck out to get two new tyres for my car and a wheel alignment. Bill had some shopping to do so that worked out fine.

Following the shopping we decided to do some work. First of all we put a park bench together to sit out the back and we followed that up by laying another 60x60 pavers. It makes the space near the BBQ look much better. I even put a few more out to the washing line so that there is no need to get wet and they do the just well.

By this time I had had enough of work and it was time to prepare some lunch. I barbequed some salmon and garlic chilli prawns along with onions, sweet potato and zucchini. Inside on the stove I cooked spuds and silverbeet. So it was a lovely luncheon. Perhaps I will be inspired to cook that well for my wife when she returns. Beautiful day for a BBQ too.

After lunch Bill and I looked through heaps of videos that I have downloaded from the Internet. You know, funny vids, motorbike and car accidents, that sort of thing. The time came to take Bill home and we had a cup of tea at his place with his very excited kelpie, Cindy.

I had to go so that I could get a parking space before the Perth Glory vs Brisbane Roar Hyundai A-League match. Glory had only a home loss and an away draw to show for their campaign so far. I stood next to the same bloke in the crowd as I did two weeks ago and he wouldn’t say a word for the whole match. The bloke on the other side of me was from the Solomon Islands (Henry Fa’arodo plays for Glory and he comes from the same village) and he was very chatty and knowledgeable.

It was a great match and the atmosphere was electric. Bobby Despotovski scored a brace of goals and missed a penalty. If there had been a set of behind posts, as in Aussie Rules footy, he may well have missed them also. Nah, I’m being unkind here.

A great new, catchy song was struck last night by someone in The Shed. All together now, to the tune of “Yellow Submarine” – Queensland Roar is a f***ing stupid name, a f***ing stupid name, a f***ing stupid name. It was sung with much gusto and once the chant had died down the creator was given a rousing round of applause. It was most appreciated by anybody near The Shed.

We won 2-1 and that is the main thing. Got home after 10pm. Jumped on the computer so that I could watch the Adelaide Crows vs Port Power semi-final match that I had taped whilst at the soccer, er football. They call it football now in this country. That is going to take some getting used to. Another late night.

Managed to sleep in to try to catch up a bit. Rang the missus after getting out of bed. She had a big day planned where she had to visit the grave of her father. It is Chuseok in Korea at the moment. That’s Korean Thanksgiving, celebrated at the Harvest Moon, and the whole country returns to the place of their ancestors and pays homage to them. I think that it is very important that Yu-Jin experiences this and I recall the memory myself quite fondly. She didn’t have much time to talk as she had to get prepared.

I popped along to Whaleback Golf Course to play 18 holes. Had to wait nearly 40 minutes to team up with a couple of guys, Brad and Daniel. The front nine saw fairly steady play with Daniel shooting 40 (par of 35), me 51 and Brad a 53.

Daniel didn't spend a lot of time off the fairway

I hit stuff all greens in regulation, or even fairways

We all played the ninth well and close together

Brad pulled his finger out for the first two holes of the back nine and played some nice golf whereas I was hitting my first tee shot into the pumphouse region, which was out of bounds, which kindly rebounded into play.

Brad had a bit of trouble with this hole and it wasn't surprising after scoring an 11 on the previous par 4 when only having a small chip to play to be putting for birdie and then screwing up the hole completely

On the 12th I duffed three sand wedge shots and still scored a bogey 5. Go figure. Compare that with Brad's 11 after he had far and away the best drive.

Daniel birdied this hole

Daniel was playing beautifully and scored a birdie 3 on the 305m par 4 15th. On the 17th it all happened. I played down the wrong fairway, having played the right fairway when on the opposite hole (know what I mean?) and put it on the edge of the green. Daniel chipped in for a par and then Brad chipped in for a bogey. I just missed my chip and only required one putt. The excitement level rose and “back to the championship”, a call that Daniel had used to shut everyone up for most of the match, was heard once more. The 18th was tight and competitive so the boys went around for another nine holes. Daniel shot a 38 on the back nine for total of 78 off the stick – only seven over par. He played quite brilliantly. The score of 106 from myself was a little worse than average but six shots better than Brad. I enjoyed the game with those two immensely.