MM Electrical's Christmas Luncheon Extravaganza 2006

I received an invitation recently from one of our suppliers to attend their Christmas lunch. Gee, I'd have to give up half a day's pay to attend, as I'm a contractor, but they had Allan Lamb, past English Test Cricketer, and Dean Jones, past Australian Test Cricketer and one of my childhood heroes, as guest speakers. How could I turn down the invitation?

I'm glad that I went. Allan Lamb and Dean Jones were great speakers and thoroughly entertained the audience with some great cricketing stories. Not short for words either of them. That's probably why they are well-suited to the public speaking profession.

Allan Lamb mentioned his 18 runs off Bruce Reid to win a one-day international and how in a subsequent match he had to stop Reid in his run-up because there was a message posted on a commercial poster which read, "Bruce Reid please ring 24264." which just happened to be how Lamb had scored in that final over and he couldn't concentrate because of the sign.

Jonesy mentioned a great deal about his 216 and how Merv Hughes had made 72 not out. But the funniest part was afterwards when they had gone to the West Indies' dressing rooms afterwards and Sir Donald Bradman joined them to meet the players. He met Patrick Patterson, 6' 5" and just dressed in a towel, one of the most fearsome fast bowlers to grace the test arena, and said to him, "Gee, you bowled some shit out there today, Patto." Patterson fired up and said something along the lines of, "You shouldn't say that or I'll take you down to the nets and f$%&ing kill you, mon!" The Don's retort was, "If you couldn't get Merv Hughes out what would you do to me?" The Don was 80 by this stage.

Allan Lamb.

Dean Jones in silent contemplation. At this stage he hadn't said anything to put his foot in it.

Dean Jones from a long distance. Inside. So don't complain about the quality. Or lack of it.

The Jones Boy and Hammy

Jones Boy, Hammy and Allan Lamb

I got a chance to talk one-on-one later on and tell him that my kid is named after him. So, he autographed something for my boy but it wasn't only afterward that I told him it's my boy's middle name. Nevermind. I spoke about the test match in Adelaide vs the West Indies where he made 216 runs, his highest test score, where I attended all four days. I spoke about hearing his 145 runs in a one-day international that was an Australian record at the time and how it was so exciting to listen to on the radio. And how he had gotten out just before I arrived at my destination and could view the wonderful way he was batting. And I made mention of his 99 not out from 77 balls against Sri Lanka. I wrote down stats as much as I could whilst listening on the radio and I still have them at home.

After a photo session I managed to ask him if Craig McDermott had hit the ball to get out in that Adelaide test match mentioned previously and Australia lost by one run. He did hit it, or rather it came off his glove, which constitutes hitting it, and was correctly given out. I was sitting in front of the Bradman stand and could swear that it had come off his arm. Now it has been laid to rest. Second hand though.

MM Electrical put on a marvellous lunch. And a couple of the ladies who attended made it quite memorable. Especially the lady in the green dress. Well, she only just stayed in the green dress but it gave plenty of blokes lots to talk about. If Shane Warne had been a public speaker at this function he would have been too busy chatting her up and getting her phone number for later. I'm sure a few guys tried that too.