Memes On My Mind

Thought of a few memes in the last couple of days.

Hertz, major sponsor of Melbourne, must be rethinking their sponsorship

The telephone never rings in the evening with someone you actually want to talk to

Candlestick maker appears to be a dying trade

Who'd have thought that it would be 37°C six weeks after summer finished?

Geelong Title Defence Meme

Geelong started their premiership tonight. Freo finished it. I memed it.

Geelong Title Defence Meme

Good Thing Greater Western Sydney Chose That Name

The newest AFL team, Greater Western Sydney, or GWS, should be glad that they chose that name. If they had called themselves the Sydney Funnel Webs, after the spider of the same name, they may have been unfortunate enough to have drafted fallen-from-grace former AFL footballer Brendan Fevola. Fev, as he is more widely known, appears to have been bitten by a spider recently and ended up in hospital. That wouldn't have been good publicity, would it?

Good To See That The AFL Draft Is Evening Up The Competition

Isn't it good to see that all of the equalisation actions brought about by the AFL, such as the salary cap, draft concessions, the draft, priority picks, etc, is evening up the competition? We had three weekends in a row whereby the winner was victorious by 150 points or more. It is unusual for a team to actual score 150 points in an AFL match let alone win by that margin.

I remember one such match, way back in 1987 when I was still at school, when I was confident that Essendon would beat Sydney. So confident in fact that I bet five bucks to a schoolmate that they'd win. I couldn't understand why he took the bet. History shows that Sydney kicked the then highest score in the competition, 236 points, and won by a whopping 163 points. Yes, I don't so much as bet on the footy these days as I learnt a valuable lesson that day. And I did hand over the money.

Getting back to my point. I read an article entitled "You reap what you sow" and it places much of the blame for lopsided results at the hands of the administrators of the game. The article pointed out that before this season there had only been 14 matches with a winning margin of 150 points or greater. The AFL.ALLTHESTATS.COM Greatest Margins Website shows that there were 15, other than the three (so far) this season. What really surprised me, and what I was looking for in the first instance after reading the article above, was the earliest margin of 150 points. I can't quite believe that it dates back to 1899 when the game was still in its infancy. We had to wait another 32 years before seeing a win like that again.

And here was me thinking that these big wins had only come about in an age of big, strong men playing the game against a group of boys. It also happened a long time prior to professionalism taking over the game.

So, Who Are The Winners From The Drawn 2010 Grand Final?

Following a dramatic draw between St Kilda and Collingwood in the AFL 2010 Grand Final yesterday I'd like to reflect on who the winners and losers might be with that particular outcome and a replay on the cards.

Winners
Certainly not Collingwood or St Kilda. Not on the day anyway.
St Kilda's Lenny Hayes for his best-on-ground performance which won him the Norm Smith Medal.
Collingwood and St Kilda players who get to play in another grand final.
Players who missed the grand final but will get a chance to play in the replay. And there will be a couple of them perhaps on each team.
100,000 more spectators who get to witness the 2010 AFL Grand Final.
Caterers, the MCC and all the businesses hosting functions catering to football suppporters.
Hotels and airlines who'll be able to charge ridiculous prices for two weekends in a row.
The AFL's coffers - surely it will add close to $10m to the bottom line.
Channel 7 who will have to provide another coverage of the grand final.
Sports memorabilia outlets who will have twice as much material for sale.
The tote and betting agencies who get to run another betting competition on the outcome of the match.

Losers
A great percentage of the 100,000 spectators who won't be able to obtain a ticket to the replay and actually see who is crowned the premier.
Collingwood (fingers crossed).
People, including the players, who've made plans to travel following the grand final and have to rearrange everything which will probably involve pernalty payments to the airlines.
Players who didn't perform well or were injured who miss out on the replay, which will go to extra time if required, and miss out on the glory of a win.
Players who get an extra pay packet. By-the-way, what does this mean in regards to the AFL salary cap if additional match payments have to be made?
Those punters who had an each way bet on the match and could only lose if there was a draw - me included.

AFL Grand Final - It's a Draw

The 2010 AFL Grand Final between Collingwood and Saint Kilda saw 100,106 spectators crammed into the MCG. The weather was perfect and the football was hard and gutsy. My heart was beating strongly when the Saints hit the lead with only minutes to play and it was pumping with scores level as play ceased.

Is this an omen for Collingwood to win the grand final replay? They didn't win on that "Last day in September", as the AFL grand final day is known, back in 1990 when they played Essendon for their last premiership due to having a draw against the West Coast Eagles earlier in the finals and causing a replay. Since WWII Collingwood haven't won a grand final in September.

The captain from Collingwood, Nick Maxwell, was upset that a result wasn't forthcoming and that a replay must be played. He wanted the game finished and a winner decided. Whatever happened to "There's no next week" when it comes to the grand final?

That blew my bet on the game each way, I suppose. I had been joking during the week that with a bet on each team the only way I could lose was if there was a draw. And so it happened.

Looks like more drama after the siren as the changerooms for both teams were flooded due to a toilet pipe bursting, according to early accounts, and then the storm hit the commentary team at the top of the grandstand.

See you again next week.

West Coast Eagles versus Brisbane Lions

I was invited to attend a dinner and football match this weekend - the West Coast Eagles versus Brisbane Lions. Even though I have no affiliation with either team the company, the meal and the match are too good to pass up. My former work colleague, Rob, invited me and I took Miky with me. She's not too keen on football but wanted to see what the meal was about.

Early at the ground

The Barry Cable Roo(m).


Tony Mac from 6PR with the Eagles' Daniel Kerr.

I thought that it was pretty fun when the meal to be served was lamb. Miky hates lamb. I've only eaten lamb on a few occasions since we were married. She did enjoy it though as there is a lot to be said for the way that it is cooked. Before the match started we filled in some betting forms - who would kick the first goal, leading team and lead at half time, winning team and margin at the conclusion of the game. As four people didn't show up to our table there were some additional forms that we made use of. My first pick was for the Eagles to win by 18 points and for my second I chose the Lions to win by three points.

Brisbane Lions warming up

Nic Naitanui (9) at the opening bounce.


Ash McGrath (L) and Jonathan Brown (C)

Early on in the match and the Lions didn't appear to have brought their kicking boots. They let a lot of goals go missing with their inaccurate kicking. David, sitting next to me, mentioned that "Jonathan Brown will be the difference between the two sides." I asked, "Would that be by one point or five points?"

Throughout the match Miky would make comments like, "Who was that kicked to?" which is exactly what the crowd and the commentators would have been saying. She reads the game quite well in fact. Maybe she's a closet football lover.

Jonathan Brown - The Brisbane Lions captain

Decent size crowd

Happy Eagles fans after a goal was scored.

Pensive Eagles supporters.

It was a pretty scrappy game with lots of turnovers by both sides. Skills were down somewhat on AFL standard and it wasn't too difficult to see why the Eagles were sitting in last place (16th) on the ladder and the Lions occupied 15th.


Tony Mac with Eagles president Mark Barnabas.

Close game during the third quarter

Happy Eagles fans.


Unhappy Eagles fan.


Very unhappy Eagles fan.

Back inside the room at the conclusion of the match where the winner of the $50 betting voucher for picking the winning margin was announced. I had already seen the winner as I was standing next to Tony Mac when they handed him the sheet - it had my name on it. The Lions had won by five points with the last kick of the game by Jonathan Brown and my pick by three points was the closest. Miky was able to take a photo of me.

Very happy $50 betting voucher winner

Betting voucher

Empty ground

West Coast Eagles versus Fremantle Dockers - Derby XXXI

Today I was lucky enough to have been invited to watch Derby XXXI between the West Coast Eagles and the Fremantle Dockers. Was a bit lucky to make it nearly on time as there were no trains running on the Armadale line as there was a body of someone who had died at the Carlisle station still on the tracks underneath a white blanket. Not sure what the story is because I can't find anything on the news. Police everywhere and TransPerth had to put replacement buses on. I don't think that I've ever been on such a crowded bus before. The game included a Captain's Club Luncheon in the Bill Walker Room prior to the match. There were guest speakers, a raffle and some nice food. Must have been some 300 people in for the lunch. Speakers included Michael Thompson, Sam Butler, Glen Jakovich, Andrew Strijk and Ian "Serge" Miller.

Took our seats after lunch and we were only six rows back from the fence on the northern wing. Not a bad spot really although we were in the Eagles Members area. Not that that stopped quite a few Dockers supporters getting in. I'd never attended a Derby match before so it was a bit of a buzz.

Good game for the first one and a half quarters then Freo dominated. After that is was a great game. I'd tipped the Dockers to win and was very pleased to see them playing to their potential. There were some big hits during the game and you could hear the bodies of men smacking together. I think that I got a few decent photos as well.

WCE vs Freo Dockers Photo Album on Facebook.

AFL Ladder Prediction For 2010

Here's Frugal Bastard's long-awaited prediction for the final placings in this years AFL premiership competition. Hmmm, ok, maybe nobody has been waiting a long time for this. And the numbers of those waiting for a short period are thin on the ground too. But here are my predictions anyway.

1. Western Bulldogs. It's their time. Hopefully Brad Johnson stays fit. They are an exciting team and play the way I like to see it played.
2. Saint Kilda. They were lucky with injuries last year and that generally doesn't happen two years in a row. Will be up there though as they are a very balanced team.
3. Geelong. Fabulous team of hard nuts and talented footballers. Gary Ablett Jr. and Joel Selwood must remain fit.
4. Hawthorn. Probably have the most devestating forward line in the premiership. Will be a long way back from missing the finals last year, as defending champion, so I don't expect them to take the crown.
5. Adelaide. They have a very balanced squad and are quite strong in the forward line. I think that the aging stars in McLeod, Goodwin and Edwards will need to be carried a bit and this will count against them.
6. Brisbane. These guys could do anything. With Brendan Fevola in the forward line they'll have difficulty in keeping the scoring to the playing field. Jonathon Brown is the most fearsome player in the competition and would make my squad any day. Simon Black, as talented as he is, isn't getting any younger.
7. Collingwood. Much as I'd like to see them pick up a wooden spoon I think they'll make the eight.
8. Carlton. Second only in deserving of my vitriol, behind Collingwood, they're probably good enough to play finals.
9. West Coast Eagles. I don't see them having enough stars to play finals this year. Their backline isn't strong enough when Darren Glass is expected to do too much and they have a fragile forward line. Hard to beat at home though.
10. Essendon. Some big names departed over the summer, mainly from the forward line, and without consistent players up front and too much reliance on a good midfield that's not capable of kicking enough goals, they will be down the ladder this year.
11. Sydney. Not consistent enough to play finals. Have a few stars and will win eight or nine games for the season.
12. Port Adelaide. Lost a superstar in Shaun Burgoyne and has kept too many of the old stars. Can't see them winning more than seven or eight games.
13. Fremantle. I reckon they'll win about six games this year. Don't travel well but reasonably good at home.
14. Richmond. Is this the year for the Tigers? No chance! Could win four games though.
15. North Melbourne. Good team but lost so many stars and will rely too much on the old guys. Not much of a forward line and lost one of their best defenders in Josh Gibson to Hawthorn. Will struggle to provide an honest effort all season.
16. Melbourne. Can't see them doing anything this year except increasing discussion in the tanking debate. So many early draft picks but no self belief. Will make at least one game a week easy to pick in the tipping.

Footy Prediction - Malthouse to go

I'll make a bold prediction. Even though Eddie Everywhere, alias Eddie Maguire, has put a succession plan in place to relieve Mick Malthouse of his coaching duties at Collingwood at the end of the 2010 season and be replaced by former captain Nathan Buckley, I don't think that that is going to happen.

My prediction is that 5th placed Adelaide Crows will beat 4th placed Collingwood tonight in the 2nd Semi Final and, the two successive finals losses to Collingwood, fielding one of the strongest teams for years for the club, will Lead to Mick Malthouse quitting as coach. Why would you suffer the ignomy of going out of the finals in straight sets and then coach one more year before being relieved of your duties as coach? Nup, I think this is the end of Mick Malthouse as Collingwood's coach.

Something that will grate with Malthouse is the fact that he coached the West Coast Eagles to two premierships and, after switching to the Magpies hasn't been able to snatch one premiership, although Collingwood rarely travels outside of Melbourne to play, and it is widely accepted that they have just about the easiest draw of any team in the national competition. That will go down as a mark of failure, I think.

Big prediction, eh?

Ben Cousins Makes Flipping The Bird Becomes Popular Again

Ben Cousins, disgraced former West Coast Eagles captain and now Richmond player, came back to Perth a couple of weeks ago for a match against the Fremantle Dockers. Ninety minutes before the game he spotted a TV camera and "flipped the bird" in its direction. Otherwise known as giving it the one-finger salute. The AFL was a bit unhappy about the action and fined Cousins $5000 as did his club. Ten grand for a gesture. I wonder what you could get away with in civilian life for a maximum $10k fine?

Anyway, it appears that the "bird" is becoming more popular. The other day I was wandering around the city and noticed a bus and a taxi trying to occupy the same position on the road. The taxi driver had overtaken on a double-white line, a no overtaking position, and had cut the bus driver off somewhat. They were both inching their vehicles forward to make life difficult for one another. Then you could hear the bus driver yelling. Finally he took his belt off, opened the door and stormed up to the front passenger door of the taxi, flipped the bird as he started mouthing off and opened the front door. He then gave some abuse and went back to his bus, leaving the taxi door open. Well, the taxi driver took his belt off, had a few words to say to the bus driver as he circled his car to close the door and got back in. Then the bus driver wound his window down, stuck his head out of the window and continued to give some abuse.

Amusing stuff. Has Ben Cousins made flipping the bird popular again? Can't see the bus driver getting fined $10k for his actions.

Melbourne - Ahead of the Rest of the Southern Hemisphere

Melbourne has a bit of a reputation for being ahead of the pack but I feel that Bruce MacEvaney went too far with his premature exclamation on Sunday. I was sitting back watching the footy, Essendon versus Geelong (we copped a hiding), when Bruce announced that it was the first day of winter in Melbourne. Well, bugger me if the rest of Australia doesn't herald the coming of winter on the 1st of June but I can't see why Melbourne should welcome it on the 31st of May.

You're still a wanker Bruce. And why didn't any of the other commentators put him right? Is he that much of a god within the industry? It's not so much about calling the match as he sees it but making the great one liners and bold statements. And it's quite obvious that he's never played the game as he has little idea, even after all these years of calling the game.

Swine Flu - It's Not That Contagious

Last I heard there has only been one confirmed case of swine flu in Western Australia. Sometimes it's not so bad to be isolated. But the guy who contracted the virus shared a plane with the Fremantle Football Club and they were very concerned that the players might have caught the virus. This would lead to an upheaval in the AFL fixtures for the year if they were unable to field a team for a week or two whilst players were quarantined.

They needn't have worried. If you've seen the Dockers form of late they can't as much catch a football so what hope have they got of catching a virus?

The Pot Calling The Kettle Black

The season proper hasn't started yet and already we've seen some biffo in Aussie Rules football. The funny part is that it was two teammates that hit the headlines. The really funny part is that they were from the Carlton Football Club. The hilarious part is that David Rhys-Jones said the guy dealing out the biffo, Setanta O'hAilpin, was a disgrace. Coming from a man who visited the tribunal on charge a record number of time, 25, and who received a suspension of two years at the age of 41 after assaulting an opponent and leaving him with multiple fractures, that's a bit rich.

I dunno what lead to the biffo and then the kick in the bum but it was only Cameron Cloke, himself a disgraced footballer delisted from Collingwood after speeding at 144 km/h in a 100 zone whilst his club was receiving sponsorship from the Transport Accident Commission and subsequently costing them a $10,000 fine, and he probably deserved it.

And it is only Carlton.

Dockers vs North Melbourne Rd 12 2008

One of the guys that we do a lot of business with had three tickets for the football to offer us. It was for an AFL match between the Fremantle Dockers and the North Melbourne Kangaroos. The Dockers had recently set a record of losing five matches in a row when leading at three quarter time. The put an end to the nonsense last weekend when trailing from half time to lose the match against the Brisbane Lions.

It was a lovely day. Spent the morning at work and went with Martin from work and Jose from site met us there later. Nice seats in the Dockers members' area not far from the action. I could tell that it would be a good day for the Dockers when I saw Shaun McManus only 20 minutes before bouncedown in a suit. If he wasn't going to play I thought that they were in with a chance.




In the end the Dockers were far too strong for a decidedly, and unusually, soft North Melbourne. Considering that the coach of the Kangaroos is from Perth and loves to beat the locals the inept performance, following a gutsy close loss to the reigning premiers last weekend, was inexplicable and unexpected. I had tipped the Dockers to win however. Great afternoon.

Dockers vs North Melbourne photo album on Facebook.

At Last The Torture Is Over

We've waited six long months since that last Saturday in September but at last the torture is over. AFL is back tonight. Ok, so it's only Carlton and Richmond but it's a start. There are some new additions to Carlton taking the field - Chris Judd (bought from West Coast), some new kid from the Under-18s competition and there should be a portaloo with Brendan Fevola's name on it close to the boundary. The man has a drinking, and weeing, problem in public. Maybe they should call it the PortaFev.

Carlton's latest addition to the squad - The PortaFev

Carlton Football Club Theme Song - Revamped by Frugal Bastard

We are the chequebook Blues
Next year we'll win more games than two
We're the team that won the wooden spoon
Buying our way back is all Carlton knows
We buy the champions for seven million
We'll take Chris Judd please

And West Coast will get bugger all
From the hard dealing chequebook Blues

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Carlton Football Club has a history of buying champions and buying premierships. And they've done it again with a "trade" which netted them Chris Judd, a former Brownlow medallist. You have to bear in mind that the AFL clubs have a salary cap of $A7 million/season to cover 38 players and Judd will be taking home 20% of that himself in 2008 at Carlton.

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The Original Carlton Football Club Theme Song

We are the Navy Blues,
We are the old dark Navy Blues,
We’re the team that never lets you down,
We’re the only team old Carlton knows,
With all the champions they like to send us,
We’ll keep our end up.

And they will know that they’ve been playing
Against the famous old dark Blues

Strong Punishment For Gambling Footballers? Don't Bet On It.

We have a little game in our country called Australian Rules Football - AFL. Some six million people fill the stands each year watching this national sport. That's a fairly signicant percentage of the population, which just ticked over to 20.7 million. There is a rule for players that they must not bet on the sport.

Been a bit of a furore recently with an announcement that four players have been found to have bet on matches. No indication that the players have been involved in match fixing or betting against their own teams. We are talking bets of between $10 and $16000. I laughed when I read that one player had bet $10 and been caught up in this affair. It's still against the rules however. The punishments could have been far worse but the AFL knows that more players have been involved, just not found.

I wonder if there will be an appeal and, if so, would the tribunal offer the player "double or nothing" as a punishment? Don't bet on it.