Who's The Biggest Loser In Michael Jackson's Death?

I pose the question - Who is the biggest loser in Michael Jackson's death?

His children - no. They will have more than generous trust funds. Michael, P. Michael and Michael II will spend more time with their cousins and other extended family. They'll also experience a closer to normal existence.

His father - nah. He's got a new record deal/label and has spent all of his time following his son's death spruiking it.

His brothers - nup. They'll just regroup as the Jackson 4. Plenty more opportunities to perform and be interviewed about how life is with Michael. Lots in it for them.

No, the real loser is Heather Mills? Yes, Heather Mills. Think about it. I believe Michael Jackson had a deal with Paul McCartney that ownership of The Beatles catalogue would be returned to to Macca upon Wacko Jacko's demise. So, if poor old Heather Mills had been able to put up with Sir Paul for another year or so her divorce would have been worth a cool half billion or so instead of her poorly US$50m settlement. I've never felt so sorry for such a gold digger.

Michael Jackson is Dead

I was a little surprised to see the news this morning that Michael Jackson was dead. The story was broken by gossip site TMZ but was unconfirmed by other sources. So I didn’t take it too seriously. I mean, how many celebrities past their use-by date create some headline to make themselves newsworthy? But it has been confirmed.

I guess the autopsy would make interesting reading. That is, if only they could cut the body open.

There was a report that he had skin cancer. I’m afraid that that wouldn’t have killed him as it wasn’t his skin so he would have been unaffected.

There’s no truth to the rumour that Michael Jackson has faked his own death so that he can move to Thailand where he can actually afford the little boys. None whatsoever.

What a climax to his life though. A warped talent that he was. Now hear this – I’m almost certain that one of his albums will be No. 1 somewhere within three weeks. His album sales will be huge in the coming month and the record companies won’t be able to churn them out quickly enough. That’s probably just what he needed to pay off his debts – die.