New Zealand Have No Hope in the IRB 2011 Rugby World Cup

Mark my words - the All Blacks have absolutely no chance of winning the IRB 2011 Rugby World Cup.  Why, I hear you ask? Let me explain.

New Zealand are hosting the World Cup.

New Zealand are the No. 1 ranked team playing rugby union.

New Zealand, being the hosts, have the most favourable fixture.

I picked New Zealand in the sweepstake at work today.

There you have it. No hope for the Kiwis. I was asked to run a sweepstake only three and a half hours before the opening match of the World Cup. I even had to ask when it started as I'm not into rugby too much. The only games I take any interest in are World Cup matches. So, I emailed my colleagues and managed to sell the 20 places in three hours. We like a bet, we do. I had two ladies conduct the draw, and they hadn't joined in and were therefore impartial, but as soon as my name and that of New Zealand was drawn out I knew fingers would be pointed at me.

And that has certainly put the mozz on the Kiwis. Anybody remember the FIFA World Cup sweepstake where I picked Brazil and got nothing?

IRB 2011 Rubgy World Cup Odds

Some Dating Tips For Joel Monoghan

Joel Monoghan, soon to be ex-rugby league player, obviously could do with some dating tips. By now you've probably heard about his sex act with a teammate's dog.

I thought that it was a shocking thing to do and typical of a drunk rugby player to come up with something like that. Having seen a censored view of the photo it isn't quite what I expected and by Bill Clinton's definition he probably didn't have sex with the dog.

Some dating tips for Joel Monoghan:

If your partner is a dog make sure that you've picked her up from the pub, she's at least 18 and she's consenting. Oh, and make sure that she isn't furry or has four legs. Also ensure that she doesn't belong to a teammate. And keep the camera out of it.

Not that I think he'll be doing much dating in the near future.

Tri-Nations Rugby - Matt Giteau vs South Africa

Went to the rugby on Saturday night. A generous vendor supplied me with a ticket. It turned out to be the match between Matt Giteau and South Africa although it was supposed to be the Wallabies (Australia) vs the Springboks (South Africa). Giteau did all the scoring himself apart of the dying minutes try by Lachie Turner.

Match report.

I'd known about the game for weeks and was looking forward to it although I'm not a rugby fan and have never attended a match before. So what do you think happened? Take the boy to his sport, come home and rake the back lawn, cut some grass that was overgrowing and vacuum out the cars. Just as I'm finishing I realised that I was supposed to be somewhere. Looked at my watch and thought that I was supposed to be somewhere 10 minutes ago and it's going to take me about three quarters of an hour to get there. I rang a workmate who was also going but no response. Had a gander at the phone book and found the mobile number of the guys supplying the tickets. Called him to say I would be a bit late and that he could leave the ticket at the gate for me so that I didn't disturb him. Turned out that the place we were supposed to meet had shut the doors to non-members just before he arrived as he'd just missed a train and was slightly late also.

Actually didn't miss anything apart from the national anthems. As we were taking our seats the kickoff took place. The game of rugby union is quite fast. The Springboks completely outplayed the Wallabies and deserved their win. I was a little disappointed that the crowd didn't get into too much but the Aussies were too far behind to threaten really. And Subiaco Oval isn't conducive to large groups of people to get singing together. Well played to the Boks but our boys kept trying hard and made the scoreline look respectable in the end at 32-25. Gee, the game goes so quickly without time-on and only 40 minutes each half.

Afterwards we wandered down to the Subiaco Hotel for drinks and a chat session. So busy. Saw one guy who was a group member of "blokes punching above their weight". But he successfully pulled a bird. Got on quite well with the other match attendees. It was a great night. My clothes sure stank of cigarette smoke afterwards though.

Photos on Facebook.

Is Australian Rugby Trying To Turn Players Gay?

It's a worry to hear that there is a rule within the NRL that players can't take a woman back to their hotel room. Brisbane Bronco's Joel Clinton took a woman back to his hotel room prior to a match last month and was fined, wait for it, $50,000. The headline reads, "Woman in room costs Brisbane Bronco $50K" which sounds more like she was a high-class hooker but that's not what the story was about. It was against the Bronco's players' code of conduct, and the NRL is quite concerned about sexual shenanigans ruining the face of the league, therefore he was slapped with the huge fine.

It's almost enough to turn a man gay, don't you think? At least there's no rule about bringing a bloke back to your room. How ridiculous.